Inspiration

The essence of life is that it’s challenging. Sometimes it is sweet, and sometimes it is bitter. Sometimes your body tenses, and sometimes it relaxes or opens. Sometimes you have a headache, and sometimes you feel 100% healthy. From an awakened perspective, trying to tie up all the loose ends and finally get it together is death, because it involves rejecting a lot of your basic experience.
-Pema Chodron

My colleague (who I also consider my life coach) read me that quote a couple weeks ago. It hit me hard because it’s so true. I’m constantly beating myself up because I have piles of laundry that needed to be folded two weeks ago, or because I have stacks of bills and papers that need to be filed. I also have guilt about not always keeping up with friendships like I should. Or why I ate like crap yesterday and didn’t go for a walk because I had too much work to do. I could go on forever. What I’m trying to say is that I have guilt for always dropping the ball in some aspect in my life. I can’t live like this! Things will never be perfect, and that’s life, right? I printed a couple copies of this quote and have them hanging in my work area and in my kitchen. I need a constant reminder that imperfection is life. Or that life is imperfection.

I DVR the Oprah show every day. I simply love her show. I think most of the time she presents real and important issues that matter. While I don’t have time to watch many of the shows, I try to watch the most inspirational shows. I watched a couple shows during the last week that really moved and inspired me again to live life to the fullest. And to appreciate every second I have with my kids.

Oprah interviewed Michael J. Fox, and he said something that I’ll never forget. He said that “every moment is special and important”. He was talking about how no matter what he’s doing, if his kids want to show or tell him something, he’ll stop what he’s doing to see what they want to show him. He said whatever they want to share is more important than what he’s doing. As parents, how often do we tell our kids “later, not now, I’m busy”? I’ll be the first to admit I’m guilty. You never get time back. You can never go back and talk to your 7 year old daughter who wants to tell you about how well she printed her name. It’s no secret that kids grow up in the blink of an eye. It’s no secret that we don’t live forever. It’s no secret that we will die some day. He’s an incredible man, and reminded me how important it is to grab onto every moment in life. I read his first book years ago, and I definitely think I’m going to buy his new book.

I also watched a show about incredible fathers, and I cried like a baby when she got to the story about the soldier who kept a journal for his unborn son. His wife purchased a journal that was specifically for fathers to write in for their children. During her pregnancy, he was deployed to Iraq and took the journal. He began writing in the journal faithfully. We wrote about life, God, and growing up. Real issues that any father would discuss with his son. He was a beautiful writer!

Shortly after the birth of their son, the husband came home for a small amount of time (I think 6 weeks). Then he was sent back to Iraq, where he was killed by a road-side bomb. Sad, sad, sad. I also felt very angry listening to this story, but I won’t get into that! While the father had very little time with his son, his words live forever in his journal. His wife published a book based on his journal – I’d like to check that out as well. I haven't been keeping up with my kids' journals lately, and need to get back to writing in them.

Again, this story has reminded me how precious life is, and how I need to focus on the big stuff, and not sweat the small stuff. Family and love is what it’s all about. The rest is just a sack of small potatoes. Or ba-day-das, as my Aunt Rita would call them.

Today is *still* going to be a great day…

…even though I woke up with a sore throat. God love children and their germy-germs. Either way, it still will be a super day because I’m alive and healthy, right? A woman I didn’t know well passed away last night of cancer. She was in her early 40’s, with a husband and two children. She was diagnosed less than a year ago. The cliché “Life is too short” is not a cliché at all. It’s a true statement for many of us. Live for the now, tell the people you love that you love them. Appreciate them – even the little things they do.

I try to thank my husband, Mr. M for everything he does to help his family, and I don’t tell him to boost his ego. I tell him because I truly am thankful for meeting such a wonderful person. Speaking of thanking the guy…the last few months he’s been working on the last true reminder of what this house used to look like. One more coat of paint, a rug, some window covers, and this porch will be good as new!

Over the last few months, I’ve become somewhat of a TV addict. Usually, many of my programs get taped on the DVR, but never watched – because I just don’t have time. Lately I’ve been contemplating this new addiction. I attribute it to:
1. The invention of the DVR. Before DVR, I’d miss programs left and right because I was never available when the shows were on TV
2. The mental numbness TV provides. I’ve never been busier in my life than I currently am. TV is a way for me to truly escape! I don’t have to read anything, respond, think, react, or solve a problem. The TV does it all for me. It’s an outlet that allows me to just be…maybe not the best, but it’s working for me right now.

Hello World

My good friend Kate inspired me to start a blog. I’ve tried the blog thing before, but never really succeeded. I’m not entirely sure if I’ll keep up with this one, or what I hope to accomplish. I don’t expect any readers, though welcome anyone who should enter. I’m not quite sure of what I will talk about? Daily experiences? Deeper thoughts and feelings? We’ll have to see where this blog takes me (if anywhere).

I’ve recently adopted the mantra, “Today is going to be a great day.” I enjoy telling my infant and daily companion (my dog) this line each morning. It helps put my mind in a positive place.

I have an incredibly inspiring colleague (who I consider a friend as well) who has taught me so much about life in such a short span of time. I wish I had met her years ago. She takes nothing for granted, and lives her life the way a life should be lived. I don’t think she knows it, but she’s really helped me to self reflect and think about what I want out of life.

I keep journals for my kids. Writing in those journals helps to stop and reflect on their lives and experiences. I can’t help but smile while I write, and think about how wonderful it will be for both of my sons to have memories stored away…before they could even remember their experiences. There are no video clips or scrapbooks of me and my sisters as kids, and it makes me sad! My oldest loves to sit down with his good ole Ma and watch old VHS videos of him in diapers.

I work from home, and every day seems the same. I’ve been really trying to look at things differently each day…to change perspective, to do things a little differently. I’m working on it.

Perhaps this blog will serve as a “journal” for me?

So today, I try something new and start a blog.

I leave you with a picture of my work-buddy (and her brother).